When Your Heart’s Not In It Anymore

Every day, people manage to do things or participate in something that they don’t particularly care for, whether it’s inconsequential or something important. We do the best we can to meet our obligations, but it’s usually hard to do something when your heart is not in it. iStock_000012601217Large

When it comes to responsibilities for our business or for a job or anything connected to money, and our heart is just not in it, well it can cost us in more than one way. Our physical, emotional and mental health may be adversely affected and other people will likely be involved. Stress may increase because our survival needs get triggered.

It may feel like a sacrifice you’re willing to make or a matter of priorities when you consistently work at something that you cannot stand. In the end, if you do feel good about it and proud and happy, then keep it up because your heart is engaged in some way even if it’s not obvious to you.

But, life gives us clues and looking at what’s going on with an intention to know the truth will bring you closer to what your heart wants. Whatever approach you take, be honest about it.

We usually know when we’re unhappy or not good at something. Or, when we’re ignoring something and we’re putting our business or finances at risk.

Maybe you’re good at what you do, but there’s no challenge left or your creativity feels stifled. Or, it could be that whatever it is, you find it too hard to continue on.

Honesty really is the best policy here because we can’t really make any effective changes if we’re ignoring the truth.

The problem is that when your heart is not in it anymore, anger and resentment and feeling unappreciated can build up. Procrastination tends to set in. If this happens, it can be helpful to get a fresh perspective:

  • Focus on how you’re serving others and yourself
  • Notice your specific purpose and the greater purpose
  • Appreciate yourself for the difference you make
  • Continue to envision a better scenario
  • Make a plan to move beyond the status quo

If this doesn’t do it for you, then greater attention is warranted. After all, when your heart’s not in it, then you’re suffering in some way and that can’t be a good thing unless you really like being a martyr.

Keeping yourself locked in a business or in a career or situation that is causing you to suffer shows a lack of self-love. And, we are talking about the heart here so if there’s a lack of self- love, self-care or self-appreciation, then loving change of some nature is called for. Take some time to ponder and evaluate and acknowledge the truth of the situation. Love yourself enough to reach out and get some help, embracing the change that makes your heart sing.

© Deborah A. Lindholm

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